Update: Extraordinary Creativity

Happy April 1st! 

Here’s a sooner-than-later interview update about Deb Rumpel. She went into crises mode right before finishing January's Extraordinary Creativity interview.  Then her chickens went into chaos as well. I asked Deb how she managed to stay upbeat through all of it.

Welcome back, Deb!

Deb, the creative photographer 2017

Thank you for your interest in an update. These past few months have not been what I would have scripted, but they are reality. I herniated a disc in my lower cervical spine while trying to tidy up my home. (Guess I won’t do that again.) Having not experienced this before, I didn’t know what happened but I did feel level 10 pain running down my arm. It was unbearable. After five days, I had x-rays and an MRI and discovered the disc issue. A week later, I got in to see a neurosurgeon who fast tracked me into surgery four days later. Due to the severity of the herniation and the neurological presentation it was showing, he didn’t want to delay for fear of permanent nerve damage. Hard to believe they consider this in the “out-patient” category, but they do. Thankfully I was able to stay overnight because of anesthesia effects.

Recovery has been painful and slow. I am now seven weeks post-surgery. Even though the nerve pain was instantly gone, there is still muscle and tendon involvement. Now I move onto physical therapy and see what improvements I can make there.

Back at the bat cave, life goes on. I have a son who is getting married in 2 months and life is getting more windy than usual around here. My creative brain is on overload and I have to “talk it down”. My neck and shoulders can’t keep up with what my heart wants to do and accomplish, not only with wedding stuff but also with my chicken coop/run as well as my home.

The chickens have had a rough couple of weeks. We lost one of them due to 2 worms growing in its trachea. What! It is not a common thing up in the North but it has started to occur more often due to the milder winters. Chickens can pick it up from eating infected earthworms. Like you can stop a chicken from scratching and eating whatever comes out of the soil. All of my chickens had to be treated to prevent any more of that. We didn’t eat their eggs for a month, which was sad but, in an effort to keep our food as clean as possible, it was the best call.

Then I lost another chicken just last week. I was so sad because she was an awesome layer. She was egg bound. This means that an egg gets lodged in the oviduct and, because the intestines are shut down during laying, this blocks them up as well. When not caught immediately, it is fatal.

You asked how I stay so upbeat. Hmm. I don’t feel upbeat all the time. I love being with friends and making memories. When I am around people I definitely feel an energy. But in the quiet, it has been hard and frustrating. I need to keep speaking truth to myself. I need to keep reminding myself that this is not forever. I pray for strength. I ask the Lord to show me where to file the things that are hard. I ask Him to give me a new perspective on challenging and disappointing situations. Why? Because I know He is in the business of redeeming all things. He doesn’t waste anything in our lives. I ask Him to give me His eyes, sometimes through many tears. He wants to hear it all from my heart. If I didn’t have a heavenly Father, I don’t think I could do this without turning bitter or losing hope all together at times. I know there is a flip side to things. I know there is something at work that I can’t see in the micro but if I were able to back up and see the whole timeline of my life, it would be a woven tapestry and not just a tangled mess of threads.

There have been many lonely moments in the pain and in the recovery of the last few months. There have been many tears and some temper tantrums in the pain when I just didn’t think I could do another day or even an hour. It is then that I try to speak these truths to myself.

There is a song by Shane and Shane called “Though You Slay Me”. As I listened to it one day, I felt like creating something around it to help remind me of these words. In the middle of song, theologian Dr. John Piper speaks these words: (picture attached at bottom)

Not only is all your affliction momentary.
Not only is all your affliction light-
In comparison to eternity and the glory there-
BUT all of it is totally MEANINGFUL!
Every millisecond of your pain from the fallen nature or fallen man-
Every millisecond of your misery in the path of obedience-
Is producing a peculiar glory you will get because of that.

I don’t care if it was s cancer or criticism.
I don’t care if it was slander or sickness.
It wasn’t meaningless!
It’s doing something! It’s not meaningless.
Of course, you can’t see what it’s doing.
Don’t look to what is seen.
When your mom dies.
When your kid dies.
When you get cancer at 40.
When a car careens onto the sidewalk and takes her out-

Don’t say, “IT’S MEANINGLESS!” It’s not.
It’s working for you an eternal weight of glory.
Therefore, do not lose heart but take these truths and day by day focus on them.
Preach them to yourselves every morning.

Get alone with God and preach His Word into your mind until your heart sings with confidence
That you are new and cared for!

~John Piper

Here is the Youtube link to Shane & Shane’s “Though You Slay Me”:  https://youtu.be/qyUPz6_TciY

Deb's Artwork

All that to say, I am not always upbeat. I have an upbeat personality but life is hard. If not yet or right now, it will be. We don’t live in a perfect world. We get weary and lonely, tired of the fight. But if we have truth to hold onto, if we have hope that this is not all there is, then we can keep going. We can know we are not alone. Because my sins are washed clean in the blood of the Lamb I have hope that I am working my way home to where I truly belong. I am a pilgrim on a journey.

I am thankful that I don’t have to do this life alone, either. I have been given friends and family and a wonderful church body. They aren’t perfect. They aren’t always there. But God sees and knows, and He sends encouragement at just the right times (not always in the places I think I need it most but in the places that I most recognize that He is in it, without a doubt).

Today is a new day. His mercies are new every morning. There are adventures to have. Things to forget. Aches and pains to remind me to sit down and ice my neck. There are phone calls to make and receive. Some of those will be life sucking and others will give life. There will be birds to listen to and music with which I can gently dance to. There will be highs and lows. And in it all, there will be a Father who is holding my hand and leading me through. I am a child of the King and that is why I can keep moving forward. To God be the glory!

Extraordinary Togetherness - 35 Years and Counting

2016 Edition

By TLC Nielsen

I’ve met a lot of married folks in my life, but none as unique as Dan and Elizabeth Chessman. They celebrated 35 years of marriage last year and are active in so many spheres: work, church, music, volunteering, horse training and more.  Both have faced health challenges and keep on keeping on. The energy and positive insight of these two is evident in Dan’s answers to my 7 questions (one for every 5 years of their marriage!)

Welcome, Chesman Duo!

Q) You two put so much time and energy into everything you do. I thought I’d start out by asking what holiday activities you chose to invest yourselves in, separately and as a couple?

A) This Christmas holiday season has flown by us so fast, we, unfortunately, didn't get everything done that we wanted to do in preparation for it.  Individually, Elizabeth did all the decorating of our home and did a great job doing so even though she has been in a lot of pain from rotator cuff surgery performed last June.  It is taking a longer period of time to heal due to the serious nature of her injury and the toll diabetes has taken on her body over the years.  It didn't help to have a visit from a flu bug that made its way to both of us during the time, either!

As a couple, we celebrated part of my vacation traveling down to St. Louis, Missouri, on Amtrak, to visit my 94 year old mother and my brother (before the floods came).  It was special to do this because this was the first year working for the railroad that I have had enough seniority to request Christmas week off.  It was also the first time Elizabeth and I had not only traveled somewhere for Christmas, but taken the Amtrak anywhere since I left them to join Metra ten years ago.  The trip was great!  We were joined by our youngest son, who flew in from Dallas. The three of us traveled by Amtrak back to Chicago on Christmas Eve to celebrate Christmas with our two other children.

We also had the delight during this season of hosting our oldest son and his girlfriend for a dinner and a concert by Sarah Groves, a well-known Christian songwriter and singer.

One of the highlights this season for Dan was hosting a Christmas party on his evening commuter train shortly before going on vacation for a small group of passengers and co-workers he has had the privilege to get to know over the last couple of years.  God has put them on his heart and grown in love for them. The party was a simple way of showing that.  His heart's desire is to live Christ among them and love them to bits in the hope that someday they will see and understand how precious they are to God and accept his priceless gift of the cross into their hearts.

Dan was blessed with an opportunity, also, to visit and minister with his cello to an individual from church, who is in hospice. It has been a great holiday season of blessings for which we are deeply grateful. 

Q) What parts of your life keep you bonded as a couple? How do the separate elements play into this?

A) Without question, the most powerful force that has helped us bond as a couple from the very beginning in our marriage has been our individual and corporate walks with the Lord!  With his strength and power we have stayed together through the years, even with a two-plus year separation.   It has been God who has enabled us to do this, for without him, we would not been able to come close to trying to keep the vows we made in the beginning. 

Our common, consistent faith in the strong anchor and the Grace to continue to hunger and thirst for God, to be desperate for him enough to maintain our spending one-on one time with God frequently and be involved with his people in a good church, has been the key.  And this is a gift from the Lord, not because of any steadfast personal strength! Without this gift of himself, we would not have had the strength or motivation to make it through the times of great difficulty, past and present.

It has also been helpful to find a hobby that we are both passionate about.  This, too, has been a gift. For us, it has been an enjoyment of horses.  We have been very fortunate to enjoy them together and to serve each other in making this a reality.  This has been a recreational intimacy.

Q) You’ve had some health concerns as you’ve reached the “over 40” status of life. I loved the newspaper article on Dan’s replacement surgery. But how have you two “danced” together in marriage through the pain and healing you’ve both experienced?

A) Our physical and emotional health has had a powerful impact on our marriage through the years. We both brought backgrounds that have presented hurdles to emotional intimacy. Elizabeth's diabetes and Dan's recent surgeries heavily affected life's routines. Every marriage experiences these challenges at some point, and in various degrees, yet facing them is part of the journey together.  In our marriage, these have been opportunities to learn to love and serve each other. They cannot be denied or fled from, and part of our "dance" together is striving to grow to help each other in sincere love in the many needs these challenges present.

Q) Elizabeth and Dan, you both give so much time as volunteers. How do you juggle everything else and volunteering?

A) It is true that Elizabeth and I are involved in volunteer activities.  We try to work around each other's passions to minister and serve in what we feel are things God has seemingly called us to.  There is a mutual respect for each other's feelings in going about this. To be sure, it is part of our "dance," and there has to be constant effort on both of our parts to allow more time together for our marriage, by communicating about our days and how they went and about things coming up that will affect schedules and allocation of time in shared priorities and needs - individually and as a couple.

Q) Music, I know, is important to both of you. Dan is learning cello after playing baritone all these years with the Lakeland Brass. What other hobbies keep you busy, especially those you pursue together?

A) It is good that Elizabeth enjoys me practicing both musical instruments because I have had to increase the amount of time devoted to learning a new instrument as well as maintain and prepare for performances on the baritone. She enjoys listening to the music in the home, even with all the squeaks, mistakes, and repetitions! Knowing this has been of great encouragement to me to continue with both, for there are times of discouragement.  I try to be sensitive to her activities such as time of day and her desire to watch certain television programs. 

Other activities, in addition to horses, that we enjoy doing together include eating out and watching movies.  Elizabeth enjoys board games a lot and it’s good for us to engage in these.  Time spent playing those games together allows us better opportunity to communicate with each other.

Q) You two often travel to the barn together on weekends. You both love horses so how has that played into your marriage?

A) Our shared love of horses involves helping each other in our favorite activities with them.  For Elizabeth, it is riding (Western-style) and driving a horse and buggy for me. Elizabeth has, unfortunately, had to cease with horse activities due to health for a long time.  We hope she can again pursue riding again.  She has been a huge help for me in the past when preparing the horse and buggy for an afternoon drive, with its myriad of necessary tasks.  I hope she can regain full use of her shoulder someday so she can help me once again.

The cool thing about having a strong interest in the same thing is that it isn't confined to, or dependent on, being able to participate in it especially in owning a live horse and all that is associated with it.  This is an interest that can be enjoyed by attending many related events taking place in a regional area, and even traveling to other regions and continents.  This, I believe, would be true for a lot of many other interests a couple might have together.

For us, this interest has provided a therapeutic outlet both individually and as a couple. It has provided a broadened opportunity to interact and bond together.

Final question, I promise! What would you say are the top two marriage building insights you’ve learned through three and a half decades?

A) I would say the number one of the two most important marriage building insights would be each spouse's personal walk and growth in their relationship with Jesus Christ. Our foundation on a daily basis has to be receiving the spiritual feeding we each need not only for ourselves, but for our spouse, our children, and the others God has and will bring into our lives in order to live out the tremendous love, mercy and grace God has poured out lavishly on us during our numbered days on this earth!! We desperately need a power beyond ourselves to help bring his kingdom, that is, his love, mercy, and grace to this world, and it starts with God's power in each of our lives first.  We all deeply need life giving motivation, strength and endurance spiritually, emotionally, and physically (to whatever degree he has chosen) to meet the commitment marriage requires.

The second most important marriage building insight would be communication between husband and wife. Our lives are " fearfully and wonderfully" designed by God, himself, with all the differences and complexities involved. Communication between two in a marriage requires trust and clarity in order to achieve oneness in spirit and the capacity and ability to show Christ to a world truly lost to eternity.

Thank you, Dan and Elizabeth, for being highlighted on the Extraordinary Ordinary blog! 

Here's the link to the article on Dan's ankle replacement surgery:

http://www.mysuburbanlife.com/2015/06/23/ankle-replacement-serves-as-life-changer-for-grayslake-man/av2qdfs/

There are more extraordinary tales of ordinary folks featured here once a month at www.lookandbe.blogspot.com. If someone you know would like to be featured, please contact TLC Nielsen at soulfixer 13 (at) yahoo (dot) com and put “lookandbe nominee” in the subject line. Merry New Year!

Extraordinary Ordinary Journeys by TLC Nielsen

As I travel through life, I meet the most interesting folks who happen to share their incredible adventures with me when our paths cross. I met Elizabeth Sargis at a writing conference I attended this year and she shared her extraordinary journey of health. Attending this conference has been a key turning point in her life. I’ve been blessed by her story and can't wait for her to share more of it here at lookandbe.blogspot.com. 

Welcome Elizabeth!

Q) Here's an easy first question for you - do people call you Elizabeth or do you have a nickname or two?
A) I’ve never had a nickname. My dad wanted me to be named after a great grandmother whose given first and middle names were “Lizzie Bell.” My mother insisted I get the full “Elizabeth.”

Q) How did your health journey start and how long before you knew what was happening?
A) On a Palm Sunday, I was standing in church and suddenly felt very tired and slightly ill. I went straight home, thinking a nice nap would put things back in order. Within hours, I was crying out from blasts of pain deep in my legs, like my bones were being squeezed in a vice, and my skin felt really weird. Creepy crawly sensations spread over my body, like I was lying in an ant hill, and the skin hurt to the touch like a sunburn. I was also more exhausted than I thought humanly possible, yet I could not sleep. When I described the symptoms to my doctor, she ordered lots of tests to rule out MS and other autoimmune issues. When I tested negative for all the known neurological causes, she focused on the fatigue and lack of sleep. She suspected Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, but the symptoms have to persist for six months before that is officially diagnosed. I thank God that my doctor decided to start treating me as if I had that diagnosis after about six weeks of unrelenting symptoms. It took almost a year before I was also diagnosed with fibromyalgia.

Q) As a writer, how did your health impact you?
A) Most of my career writing was in the corporate world, as a communications director for large not-for-profits. When I became totally disabled, friends and co-workers tried to encourage me to keep writing, but I just did not have the energy or focus to do it.

Q) What were some of the lessons you learned through all the medical issues you faced?
A) This illness made me have to spend a lot of time at home alone, resting and waiting to be healed. It felt like a cruel joke. “Lord,” I thought, “I’m already the most patient person I know!” Ha, ha! Now I think God allowed Satan to test my patience like He allowed the Accuser to test Job’s faith. He knew the test would produce even more fruit. Now, I am not only patient but also deeply compassionate toward others who struggle with complex chronic illnesses.

Another great thing I learned was how much my husband loves me. He encouraged and helped me so respectfully, and when I would question my worth, he would say, “You are the heart of our family!” I also saw how wonderfully God provided for my son. He was a toddler when I became sick. He couldn’t even crawl up in my lap because it hurt too much. God led us to hire Christian college students to help around the house, and we enrolled our boy in Montessori preschool. We ended up loving the educational philosophy and kept him at the school for elementary and junior high. I learned that I didn’t have to be self-reliant to be a good mother.

My son and I also grew very close during the many hours we snuggled side by side on the couch. He enjoyed having me all to himself. When I started feeling well enough to do the dishes now and then, he could not understand why I was up. I said, “Honey, this is what healthy mommies do every day!”

Q) What were some of the hardest and easier points in this process?
A) A few of the hardest things:

• When I ran out of good stuff to watch on TV (which didn’t take long)
• When I couldn’t read good books because my brain couldn’t keep the characters and plot points straight
• When people behind me in lines at the store or the airport would yell at me for taking too long. 
• Sometimes I thought seriously about wearing a sign asking people to “please be patient!”
• When I couldn’t tell if a new medication was working or not because the side-effect list included the same symptoms that the medication was supposed to help with
• Learning that I have value to God even when I can’t do much of anything

I don’t know if anything was really easy, but I can remember one thing that was really fun. After being sick and pretty useless for three long years, I discovered that I could crochet lying down. I became a crochet fiend. I wore hand braces to help with the pain, but I loved being productive. In the first two months, I made twenty-seven different stuffed animals—one for each of my son’s classmates for Valentine’s Day. I still count that as one of my greatest accomplishments.

Q) What kept you and your family going through this?
A) God was faithful. About halfway through my illness, he challenged me with the words of a song based on Romans 8:28: “He makes all things work together for my good.” I kept thinking, “If it doesn’t feel good and it doesn’t look good, can it really be good?” I went through many dark moments questioning whether I could take it anymore. Then God would surprise me with something simple and beautiful like a flower or a kind word or a good laugh with my family, and the faith would come roaring back stronger than ever. 

Q) Job-wise, what were some of the fallout effects?
A) I had always been a successful, effective person. I loved bringing all that to bear in ministry. For the last four years before my son was born, I was employed full-time doing communications for a big church that got things done. I went from doing all that to being challenged by basic personal hygiene. I fell through the cracks socially because my closest friends had been the most active go-getters. People like that got frustrated when I didn’t return their phone calls or emails. I understood what was happening, but it still hurt to be “out of the loop.” I wondered if God was trying to tell me that I was doing something wrong, and I desperately wanted to figure out what it was and change it right away so that I could get back to work. Instead, God showed me that he could love me and use me even when my life looked like a total wreck. He saw me, heard me, loved me and valued me when almost no one else could.

Q) What did you wish you knew in the middle that you now know?
A) That it’s okay to let someone else do your laundry. Seriously! I felt like such a failure for not cleaning and cooking and all that. Now I cheer myself on like an Olympic athlete when I am able to fold a load of clothes. I take a lot more joy in the littlest abilities. 

Thank you for visiting the Extraordinary Ordinary here at www.lookandbe.blogspot.com. If you'd like to suggest someone with an extraordinary journey, please email me at soulfixer 1 3 (no spaces) at yahoo.