Extraordinary Listening

by TLC Nielsen

I met Juli Chaffee at church more than a decade ago. As a mother of three, business owner, counselor and spouse of 25 plus years, Juli has learned the art of true listening. She runs the Crossroads Counseling Center and is a new board member for Refuge for Women, a nonprofit organization which officially announced a new ministry home in McHenry County in October 2016 to help victims of human trafficking.

Welcome, Juli!

Q) You are one busy lady and also a runner. Where do you manage to find the time and energy?

A) Time is probably my most valuable resource right now. I wish I had more of it!!  There are so many important and valuable relationships, experiences, goals, and tasks that I need to attend to every day, so I work intentionally at prioritizing- but sometimes what I want to do and what I need to do clash and I can’t attend to everything.  I try very hard to find balance so that every day includes a little bit of self-care in the midst of all the “shoulds.”

Q) Besides running, what else do you do for fun?

A) I love travel, camping, reading, cooking, entertaining, and spending time with family and friends.

Q) Why did you become a counselor?

A) I’m not sure if there is a short answer to that- there are so many different layers to what led me into this profession.  I knew from an early age - probably 13 or 14 - that I wanted to be a social worker.  My natural gifting includes mercy, empathy and wisdom.  I also have a passion to be with people who are hurting and have learned over the years that staying present with someone in the midst of their pain, and then helping them walk through it with patience, acceptance and strength, is very holy and important work.  I love what I do and find it deeply satisfying.  

Q) How did you decide to branch out into your own practice/business?

A) Having my own practice was a goal I always had, so it was a natural progression towards that end.

Juli Chaffee

Q) Who influenced you the most throughout your life?

A) Honestly, there isn’t one person that I can point to who carries more influential weight than another.  My life has been shaped, in joy and pain, by many people and experiences.  If I had to narrow it down though, I think my kids have most influenced me.  For me, being a mom was life changing. It was the most important decision of my life to create a person (yes, of course my husband helped) and then to RAISE them!  Holy cow, what a scary privilege and honor. I worked very hard at “learning” who my kids were, what they needed, and how to best care for each of them uniquely in each stage of growth or sometimes in each hour of the day.  They helped me learn how to be kind when I was tired and grumpy, patient when there was “just one more story", grace-filled when I didn’t “do it perfectly,” joyful in the messy, to laugh every day and, most importantly, how to trust in myself rather than the opinion of others. 

Q) In what types of volunteer activities are you involved?

A) Unfortunately, I have had to limit my commitments due to the previously mentioned busy life:-) One area I am committed to is my position on the board of Refuge for Women. I am in love with this organization: what they stand for, their model for healing and restoration, and the integrity that is woven into all aspects of the program.

Q) How did you end up as a board member for Refuge for Women, an organization dedicated to helping human trafficking victims move forward?

A) I attended their fundraiser last spring and through a series of conversations with different people at the event, my name was given to Karen Schultz, the Chicago Director of Refuge.   We met for coffee to talk about the ministry, the needs of the board and what I might be able to contribute.  After a couple conversations, some prayer and “interviews” by other board members, I was asked to join!

Thanks for checking in on the Extraordinary Ordinary blog, where ordinary folks with extraordinary journeys share their adventures! If you’d like more information on how to help the efforts to rescue human trafficking victims, here are a few links:

http://www.refugeforwomen.org/

Refuge for Women on Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/RFWChicago/

National Human Trafficking Hotline: 888-373-7888

Free online course on how to help from Moody Bible Institute:

https://www.coursesites.com/webapps/Bb-sites-course-creation-BBLEARN/courseHomepage.htmlx?course_id=_274599_1

Extra Ordinary Music by TLC Nielsen

I met Becky Capelli decades ago when she was a teenager working at Drakes Office Supply. Years later, I bumped into her at a local church where she was leading the choir, and she introduced me to her spouse and their two children. It’s been a privilege to see her children blossom in music as they’ve grown up, too, and to see Becky become successful as the owner of Songbird Studio Inc. Becky’s extraordinary adventure in spreading the love of music to those around her makes her life more than ordinary.

Welcome, Becky!

Q) How did your music studio come into existence?

A) I had co-owned a music studio several years ago for about six years when my kids were babies. Once they hit school age, I had to put private music instruction to rest and get a "day job" until they were much older. I was at that particular job for about 10 years. But music, especially sharing music, is my passion so, as soon as I felt the timing was good for my family, I re-entered private music instruction by opening Songbird Studio Inc. four years ago.

Songbird Studio in Grayslake, Illinois

Q) That was a long journey! So when did your love of music actually begin?

A) I was very young. I cannot recall a time when music was not a love of mine. It is how God wired me up! I started piano lessons when I was 5 years old. Mr. Luder was my piano teacher. Our family didn't own a piano so he would meet me at our church and teach me on the church piano. My parents were later able to purchase a piano... rent to own. I guess they figured I was serious enough about it to make that investment. I think they were right! I still, to this day, use that same piano in my own home.

Mr. Luder also taught voice lessons which I began at age 10. But even beyond lessons, I was always listening, learning, and playing music any chance I could. I always say music was and still is my "thing" - it's what I was wired to do. For some it may be sports or theater or scholastics, but for me it has always been music.

Q) Who influenced you the most musically?

A) Three come to mind: my parents and Mr. Luder. I was fortunate to have the same private music teacher from the time I was 5 years old up until I went to college. He had a huge influence on me, opening up so many genres and styles of music as well as allowing me to explore my strengths and weaknesses. He taught me that learning and making music is hard work and takes discipline, but it is so rewarding and most definitely meant to be enjoyed.

My parents never missed an opportunity to allow me to use my talents, and they continually encouraged and reminded me that we each have talents which are meant to be shared. They understood and encouraged my passion for music. Some of my earliest memories of singing are with my dad. I believe this is why I am so connected to the idea of private music teaching. I had such an awesome and positive experience having Mr. Luder in my life, as well as supportive parents - a combination that is so valuable when taking music lessons.

Q) What other factors kept you involved in music through the years?

A) Most definitely the church and school. I grew up singing in church and, as an adult, I was actively involved in singing on the worship team. During my school years I participated in choir and band (percussion). 

Currently, as a music teacher and mom, I am less and less active in performing. I have found great satisfaction and joy in teaching, encouraging others to use their talents in whatever capacity they can in their lives. It's fabulous!

Becky Cappelli

Q) Where did you think your music would take you?

A) Oh my! When I was young I had my sights on performing... traveling the world and singing! But I am SO grateful that is not what I ended up doing in the long run. I think God knew I wasn't cut out for that. Instead, I can build into others who may (or may not) have those dream. I believe I am exactly where I'm suppose to be doing what I am should be doing.

Q) Did you ever consider careers outside of music? If not music , then...

A) I have not. I have only entertained other jobs/opportunities that would allow me the freedom to still do music but not a career... just a paycheck.

Q) What pivot point catapulted your life in a different, unexpected direction?

A) Probably my kids. But in such a beautiful way! As a mom (a working mom), my decisions in what and how I could provide for our family and whether or not music was a means to do so greatly revolved around my kids and my availability to them in their stages of growing up. Music had to take a backseat for a lot of years. It was always a part of our lives but not a means in which to have a career. It taught me patience and trust in God's timing. Yes, music is my passion but people, especially my people (my family) are most important. God always has a plan and He is always good.

Becky's website: songbirdstudioinc.com and you can "Like" her studio on Facebook as well here:  www.facebook.com/search/303323743096917/local_search?surface=tyah

Thank you for visiting the Extraordinary Ordinary Blog at lookandbe.blogspot.com! If you'd like to recommend an ordinary person with an extraordinary journey to be interviewed, please contact TLC Nielsen at soulfixer13 (at) yahoo (dot) com and put ExtraOrdinary Blog in the subject line.